Tuesday, 12 April 2005

Are You Ready For Some Football?

Are You Ready For Some Football?

Well ladies and gents, my sincerest apologies on the massive DeLay (from now on, I will capitalize the D and the L) in updating, Pundette has a busy busy social life and has also been away from her computer...but now, she is back in action, poring through Alligator archives, brushing up on Drudge and trying to sap a little more sarcasm from that oh-so-deep well of wit. Remembering today as she entered the Football Ticket lottery, begging for the mercy of the G.A.T.O.R.S. system, she finds herself now begging for your mercy... here's a roundup of what's been missed...

CHARLIE MURPHY: Gosh darn it! Why did I have to miss this! Why is it that I'm always missing the great events! Wouldn't that have made a hot Live Blogging session? Rest assured, kiddies, Swamp Pundette will be in top form come the Fall when she will liveblog such events. The O&B, Gator Growl, etc. Get excited.
MASSIVE ENVY: Gosh darn it! Why did I have to miss this chunk of change! Future Rhodes scholars, sheesh, those kids haven't yet seen a keg. And everything changes after you lose your kegstand virginity. Ten bucks says at least two of those kids, rebelling against the pressure they were under in high school, wind up massive binge drinkers who skip class frequently and wind up with a 2.3. That's what I call "assimilation". When in Rome...
TONY: Swamp Pundette's favorite City government guy Tony Domenech to the rescue again. Here's why. Wow we love him. What a fun guy.

Moving out of the Swamp...

FEAR AND LOATHING IN THE DISTRICT: Imagine our shock, awe, and sadness at the ranking of Ana Marie Cox, affectionately, "The Wonkette" as #3 on the DC's 50 Most Hated list! Clearly someone who sucks at life made this list. Boo. We like Wonkette so much better than that Kelly Ann Collins "Washington Socialites" drivel, which is pretty much a bastion of pictures of people who look like Jenna Bush but might not really be her. Ooooooh, intriguing. Viva Wonkette!
WEIRD GUY: Did anybody see the footage of this guy getting tackled on the Capitol steps like he had just caught a reception at Ben Hill Griffin? Nice work, Capitol Police, I sleep at night feeling safer because you're there to tackle strange men in trances setting up creepy shop on our national monuments and offices of federal business.

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